Incoherent Scribblings

The First Awkward Moment

Today’s entry, “The First Awkward Moment”, is brought to you by Expatica.com.

The first awkward moment I encountered in Germany happened within minutes of my setting foot on German soil for the first time.

A.’s family, whom I had never met, came to the airport to pick us up. I was not only anxious about meeting them because of the language-barrier that stood between us (at that point I spoke no German and my in-laws spoke very little English), but also because I wanted to make a good first impression on my new in-laws.

They were there when we exited customs and immediately A.’s mother kissed and embraced him. But when they turned to me we all shared an awkward pause. What should we do? How should we greet one another? True, we were technically family, but suddenly there was a cultural barrier between us.

As I stood there, I wondered exactly how one properly greets people in Germany and specifically, how one greets family members in Germany. Though I had been reading about Germany from the time that A. and I decided that was where our future was, I had done very little research on cultural interaction.

However, from the looks on their faces, my in-laws must have been thinking about how one greets an American family member and were just as puzzled as I was about the best way to welcome me to Germany.

If I got off a plane in America and stepped into the company of my family, we would first smile at one another, hug, and immediately begin chatting. If I was meeting in-laws for the first time in America we might shake hands, but then again we might not. It is quite possible that we would just smile and nod at one another before saying, “How do you do?”

Nevertheless, I had been abroad before and knew that, at least in France, people tended to be less contact-shy than Americans and that a standard greeting involved cheek-to-cheek contact and air kissing. I was always a bit uncomfortable with this, not only because I was never sure about how many times I was supposed to “kiss,” but because it just goes against my nature.

As I pondered what an appropriate German greeting might be, my sister-in-law suddenly stepped forward. I feebly attempted to hug her, but she clasped my upper arms in what felt like a vice-like grip. She then placed her cheek against mine and lip-smacked the air. Before I could even pretend that I was returning her greeting, she did the other side and released me. With that action, the dam was broken and I was immediately the recipient of no less than six more Küsschen.

By the time my brother-in-law approached me, I was prepared to kiss his cheek and greet him properly. Imagine my relief when he shook my hand instead!