This week’s SBQs were suggested by Heather and were sent to me over a year ago. I have not asked them yet because it is a set of extremely complicated questions and without the context that prompted them, they are very difficult to answer. I agonized many times on how to word this SBQ so it would make sense without surrounding context but I couldn’t figure out how to do it, so I shelved it.
However, today when I was browsing through SBQ submissions and stumbled upon them again, I decided the best thing is to include the context along with the questions. Therefore, in order to answer this week’s questions you should read the following text before you do so.
I recently attended a stash sale organized by friends of a stitcher who had passed away from ovarian cancer. I didn’t know the stitcher, but I quickly learned things about her, such as who her favorite designers were and that she was much better organized than I am (she had almost no duplicate charts!). In talking with her friends, plans were to donate the funds collected from the sale to the hospice which cared for her at the end of her life.
The friends had organized everything, from going through her stash right down to what they were doing the day of the sale, because her family really had no idea of the value of her stash or what to do with it.
It was a rather somber experience; I even felt tears in my eyes a few times thinking of the woman who had once bought these charts in her LNS with plans to stitch them someday, gone home and lovingly filed them away, and then been unable to complete everything she wished to do. I felt guilty I was benefiting from her death and her losses. I felt honored to be offered the opportunity to take care of some of the things she had once loved. I felt like I knew things about her from the kinds of things she liked to stitch.
I realized if something happened to me, most of my stash would languish in my home because it wouldn’t cross my husband’s mind that he should do anything with it, and he’d have no idea *what* to do with it, either.
This experience made me think of lots of questions which would probably be great for an SBQ …
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What would your stash tell others about you?
Most of us stitchers joke about having reached SABLE (stash acquired beyond life expectancy), but have you thought about what you’d like done with your stash after your death? Do you want it to reach other stitchers who will love it, too? Would your family know what to do with it or recognize its value?
How well organized is your stash –would someone be able to come in and put together a sale easily, or would it require lots of organizing work ahead of time? What would you like to see done with the funds collected from such a sale, i.e., should funds go to your family, to a charity or charities of your choice, to a charity or charities of your family’s choice, etc.?
Are there certain items in your stash which are rare and highly desired by stitchers that might make a much larger amount of money if sold on eBay? Have you done anything to designate which items these more valuable ones are to guide your family in how to handle them? Who would you tell your family should handle such a sale so that they don’t have to do it themselves? Have you done anything to make these thoughts known to others, either through discussions or through a codicil to your will?
Have you ever attended a similar sale of a passed stitcher’s stash? How did it make you feel? Did it encourage you to make any changes in your stitching lifestyle?
As you can see, these are complex questions indeed.
To answer the first (and in some ways easiest question if someone who didn’t know me, but knew cross stitch looked through my stash she would see that I am a stitcher with a variety of interests and stitching styles. She would notice everything from simple beginning charts to complex designs with specialty stitches and embellishments. She would quickly see that though I keep a variety of fabric on hand I prefer 32 count linen. She would know I was a serious stitcher because I have a full set of the embroidery floss I use most (DMC). And finally, she would also very easily find out that I have a fondness for stitching cats, pretty ladies, and flowers. 
Now for the other questions:
After my death all I really hope is that my stash goes to the home of a good stitcher. I think I would prefer that my stash is merely given to that stitcher rather than sold because it would alleviate any stress that my family might have over the value of my stash and I know the recipient would appreciate what had been given to her.