Dear Santa,
I know it’s been a long time since I wrote you a letter, but that’s mostly because for the past few years I didn’t need to write. After all, I am an adult with a full-time job and no children. This means that I can pretty much buy myself what I want any time during the year and I don’t have to wait for Christmas anymore. Sure I could write and ask you for world peace, but let’s face it: The reason people write to Santa is to request material things.
So this year I have a materialistic request for you. If you could manage to fit it in your sleigh, could you bring me a bookshelf (or possibly two) for Christmas?
You see, I have a problem. I have books all over the place and I have nowhere to put them. I have books at my mom’s house in boxes, books on the floor of my closet, books piled on the top of my dresser, and books packed away in suitcases. And even though I don’t believe in “collecting” books and have gotten rid of quite a few over the years, I can’t stop myself from buying more… especially when I find them at the thrift shop for a quarter!
Of course Santa you are probably wondering why I haven’t already bought myself a bookshelf or two. After all, I can get one at Wal-Mart and put it together with a minimum amount of cussing on my part for a reasonable price. To this I would respond, “That is true.”
And as a matter of fact, I do have one of those Wal-Mart bookshelves. I even put it together myself and only had to take it apart because I put it together wrong once. But the thing is the Wal-Mart bookshelf is not only full, it is also teetering on the edge of collapse and I don’t want another one like it.
While I buy a healthy number of mass-market paperbacks, I am a reference librarian and as a result I tend to buy a lot of fat reference books in hardcover… and those puppies aren’t especially known for being lightweight.
What I would really like this year Santa is a real bookshelf. One that won’t crumple under the weight of my Merriam-Webster’s Encyclopedia of Literature and my hardcover Allan Lee edition of Lord of the Rings. One that is eight feet tall, made of a solid wood like oak, and pre-assembled by some brawny furniture delivery man.
Hmm… now that I think about it, screw the bookshelf! Just send a brawny furniture delivery man my way and I’ll buy the damn bookshelf myself!
Sending Christmas hugs your way,
Renée, the blondelibrarian